Ramblings of My Heart and Soul

... but that's all I have.

No wondrous news here. I know most of the time when someone goes completely silent for weeks on end, they come back on with a smile and a tiny announcement. However, my big news is not so exciting.

I officially have PCOS. On ultrasound, my ovaries looked like they were winning a game of chubby bunny and labwork shows no ovulation this month. That's actually nice to have some validation that I'm not just peeing on the wrong end of the stick. In three days, I have had my initial appointment--first time ever meeting my new RE, labwork, ultrasound, two hour glucose test, two prescriptions, AND I already have all lab results back and I didn't even have to call for them! I have never had a doctor that was this proactive. She offered genetic testing for both of us as well just to be sure that we don't have a tendency toward a chromosomal abnormality. We also have a tentative plan for July and a follow-up appointment in exactly a month where we will actually decide how to proceed.

All of that makes me feel a little better; however, even with my suspicions that I might have PCOS based on Dr. Google and my own symptoms, it still hurts knowing that my body is responsible for all of this infertility heartache. It has given us a tiny smidgen of hope to see that the RE is encouraging and seems comfortable with treating us. It is nice to follow someone who is confident.

It is the worst possible timing though. My husband has been sick for six weeks with an unknown illness that causes around-the-clock abdominal pain and other not-so-fun symptoms. We can't get him in to see the doctors fast enough. He is also having to close down his business so he will be without a job. He has not been getting paid regularly for the last 9 months so I don't think it will be a huge change for us financially, but he is very concerned about what he will do now. He has always worked in jewelry and there are no other jewelry stores in town that are faring any better than he is, so he will have to find something completely new.

So, we will continue to do what we have been doing and put one foot in front of the other.

I don't think I can handle much more than that.